Positivity

I'm trying very hard today to remain positive about things. There isn't much going on that's negative... It's just one of those days... Where you wake up and don't feel quite right... So I'm trying to push through it. I still haven't spoken to him... The him. I don't know if I want to. But that's neither here nor there.

I drove my sister all over the free world today. That was interesting... It was hot. Thankfully, I am a reptile who loves to bask in the sun. I wish I could add images inline on this, but no. Maybe there's another app for that? I bet there is...

I'm rambling on about nothing... As usual, right? I have no idea what to talk about today. No one cares anyway. My cat has decided he owns the foot of my bed and every night when he meows for me to get in it, he bites my feet until I move them out of "his spot", which is really the entire foot of the bed. I think it's time to kick him off the bed.

Thoughts are racing by, but they're incoherent nothings as far as thoughts go... You can't really verbalize half a thought. Does anybody else have that problem? No? Just me?

I feel like I haven't talked to you guys in forever. I don't like it when I go too long between entries. I start to miss you guys... Whoever it is you are... My audience... I like you guys. Maybe sometime we can talk.

I feel like I was intended for a warmer climate than where I'm at. I intend to move south at some point. I think I was made for the south. It's too damn cold up here.

I've been pretty anxious lately, thinking about the future. I don't know who is going to be in it, since I haven't decided... And I refuse to until I'm damn well ready. I don't know if I'll make it into the program I'm aiming for, or if I should just go with an English major, which I'd like better anyway... How better to find my people than to do something I like, right?

Speaking of which... Where the hell are my people?? I'm in my thirties. I should've found them somewhere by now, but I don't feel like I have at all. I have friends, but it's a few scattered here and there... No circles, just a few people I like. They still don't feel like "my people", except for one... I feel like she sees me. The rest it takes work to keep around. I don't mean the normal kind of friendship work either.

This has gotten decidedly not positive. I guess I'm not very good at positive. That's probably half my problem. I'll work on that. I need to write more music too... I feel like there's a song I should be writing this week, while there's all this change in the air, but he doesn't inspire me much lately... Perhaps a song without a male muse is in order.

I can't sleep. I'm excited, and anxious about mostly nothing. On both fronts. Very odd. I just got a sudden craving for potatoes. I wonder what's in them that makes me crave them ALL THE TIME. Carbs, I guess...

Ok, I'm fine boring you guys with all my rambling. Thanks for reading my nonsense. :-)